What to do if the child is aggressive?
Case: Hao Hao is two and a half years old. When playing with his friends, he often bites and beats people.
Haohao’s grandmother gently beat him and said, “This child has the same temperament as her mother. He has six relatives who don’t recognize him. He often bites even me.
“Grandma thought that when she hit Haohao, she educated Haohao, but Haohao loved to bite more and more. Later, Haohao’s grandma had to let him play with his children.
First, psychological reasons: When children have aggressive behavior, parents are often very angry and use some violent means to take measures to stop them, such as Granny Haohao’s approach in this case.
Adverse consequences: Doing so will give your child the recognition that if someone does something wrong, you can hit him.
Children’s imitation is the strongest. In fact, many of the children’s bad behaviors and habits are imitated from the surrounding living environment such as parents, peers, television, etc.
Grandma Haohao’s “violent violence” approach will only deepen the child’s misunderstanding and make the child’s bad behavior more and more serious.
Perth psychologists suggest that parents should patiently communicate with their children.
Once you find your child ‘s aggressive behavior, you should first ask the truth of the matter, and then teach the child the appropriate corrective method.
Many times the reason why children quarrel is often for toys. At this time, adults should come forward to mediate, such as “let your brother play for a while, wait for us to play.”
In addition, parents should help their children develop a good habit of politeness and modesty, and pay special attention to developing their children’s compassion and love.
This can be done using the opportunity to watch small animals in the zoo; in life, parents should not blindly play the role of “never hurt”. When encountering them, take some simplified methods to let the children care about themselves; DadMutual concern between mothers can also provide a good example for children; father and mother can also guide children to care about each other; parents should also be careful not to have aggressive behavior in front of children.
Such a warm and safe family level must be able to effectively reduce the possibility of children’s attacks.
Second, psychological reasons: When the child’s problems appear to be related to the genetic personality of the parents, adults often overlap with the results attributed to “genetic”.
Adverse consequence: Actually, it is justified for the child’s bad behavior. It is an “external attribution” approach. The child will think that his mistake was caused by others and has nothing to do with himself.
Over time, the child may become an irresponsible person.
In addition, the cause of the problem is attributed to “heredity”. The subtext is that this behavior is immutable, so it is not conducive to correcting the child’s bad behavior.
Third, grandma’s statement also damaged the image of the mother in the child’s mind, which may cause the child to develop some attitudes and behaviors that do not respect the parents.
Experts advise: Children are very malleable.
Therefore, parents must first understand that genetics only provides a foundation for the development of their children. As long as they are properly educated, children can form correct behaviors and good personalities.
Parents should analyze from the perspective of their children and their own education methods, such as “when did the child start this behavior?
“” Is the child’s behavior like this affected by the parents’ bad behavior?
“” The child’s mistakes cannot be changed, is there a problem with my education method?
“and many more.
As long as parents give a little more love and patience, use appropriate education methods, set a good example for their children, and create a good environment for their children, they will certainly be able to make their children grow up healthy.
The elderly should take care not to blame the parents of the children in front of the children, but help the parents to maintain a good image in the eyes of the children.
3. Psychological reasons: When children often quarrel or fail to cooperate with their partners, adults will often stop giving children out for various reasons (such as protecting their children from harm or avoiding conflicts with other children’s parents).Already.
Adverse consequences: Not having any contact with peers will have a very bad impact on the child’s mental health, especially mental health.
If children are separated from their peers, they will not be able to develop various interpersonal skills, such as not being able to establish and maintain good relationships with others, and to resolve conflicts with peers well.
In addition, when playing games with peers, children often have to think and reason, such as how to win by correcting the rules of the game.
Children can feel very happy and have a sense of belonging when they interact with their peers.
Therefore, isolating children from their peers is very detrimental to their cognitive, thinking, and emotional development.
Psychologists recommend that parents ensure that their children have enough time to interact with their peers.
In the case of Hao Hao, parents can punish him for a short period of time to prevent him from playing with his partner, so that he can recognize the loveliness of his companion, but must not forbid the child from going out for a long time.
Parents should pay attention to their children’s problems when they interact with their peers, how the children solve these problems, or ask the children instead, and then analyze with the children.
In this way, children can gradually develop their ability to resolve conflicts and social interaction, and grow up healthy while winning friends.